arcanus: (Default)
She drinks it down down down
For all the old old days
She’s thinking of it now
It’s nice to get away
But what a fine day for a parade
arcanus: (blue stars)
“Why do they always teach us that it's easy and evil to do what we want and that we need discipline to restrain ourselves? It's the hardest thing in the world--to do what we want. And it takes the greatest kind of courage. I mean, what we really want.” - Ayn Rand.

My Plans

Dec. 11th, 2010 01:24 pm
arcanus: (swim beatles)
I've pretty much made up my mind. I want to go to Law school.

(Why Law? If you're interested to know why, come ask me personally and I might wanna tell you.)

Previously, I've shared my intentions with several friends, some close and some not-so-close. Instead of being encouraging, a few of them burst out saying, "Huh, are you serious?"

To be honest, in my current position, yes, it is quite an impossible dream going to Law school. Neighbourhood JC, Arts stream (where doing well is all about luck, well mostly.) But I am not prepared to give up. I don't think it's impossible. Even better since a country like mine now has not one, but two universities offering Law! With the effort and determination I'm going to put in, I say hell yeah, it's definitely possible!

As for now, I've dropped my plans and desire to go for an overseas education. It finally struck me that my familly really cannot afford any overseas education for anyone in the house. I am coming to terms with this fact and also learning to be very grateful for my family being able to afford slightly more than basic necessities.

arcanus: (scuba vintage)
 I'm all psyched up to do some intensive studying this holiday.

Somehow, I feel that it's gonna be different from the past 8 years of year-end holidays I've had in my life. This time, I'm really gonna study as planned. Albeit not entirely as planned, I'm sure it'll be rather productive. I have faith in myself!!

I'm not ashamed to say that I'm aiming for top 4% in cohort for my internal school exam results next year. I know it's quite impossible, but aim high, drop low (low as in, by a little bit). Just what it takes to get into UCLA. I am indeed considering an overseas education even though I have no means to do so. It's just an option, I'm keeping all my options open at the moment. 

Before I start studying proper: completion of holiday homework. Sigh, tonnes of Literature to catch up with. Contrary to popular belief, I do not particularly enjoy reading as much as normal people do. I love reading/skimming through newspaper articles and new magazines such as The Economist. However, after all these years, I noticed that I have no patience to sit down, complete reading one proper novel by myself. I even struggle to complete a short story sometimes. I do not know what's with me. I am embarrassed to mention this fact in front of my classmates, typical Arts students who are probably obsessed with reading and would flame/judge me for that. 

Ironically, reading stacks of History notes isn't a great problem. This shows that passion really drives me. 

I wonder if I'll have that much of a passion when I'm exploring my possible career path of becoming a Lawyer. I am down for this Law Programme, apparently quite prestigious! I am psyched. I get to do a week worth's of internship alongside a real lawyer. I wonder why the lawyers involved are willing to waste precious time to entertain/deal with insignificant students like us. I hope they're nice. Even if they're not, I really do hope I either develop a passion for Law, if not start to develop some hatred for this field. Actually, I secretly would prefer the latter because I know it's gonna be tough attempting to enter the Law school in a country like mine and obviously coming from a school like mine. I've never heard of any lawyers originating from my school. I doubt there's any but if I so happen to develop a passion for Law after this programme, let me be the first.

Jam-packed, exciting holiday ahead. Meeting up with people that matter. Discovering myself. Finding my passion. Starting to mould my future by studying hard... Ahh I can't wait! 

Wish me luck, guys! (logically speaking, I doubt anyone's reading.)
arcanus: (bang beatles)
Whoo hoo. New layout. "Imported" (manually) some posts from my previous account. Now NOBODY should know about this unless I tell him/her.

It's been a century since I made use of my graphic/web design skills. I used to be so good at it. Now, the hell, can't even code without getting a headache.

School's been okay. Exams just ended. Have to report back to school tmr for an all fucking girls camp. I know right. It's not that I don't appreciate the teachers' effort for planning this. It's just that I do not have enough time to carry out my post-exam activities. Everything is not "going according to plan" and I hate it.

Because of school, I can't start my 7-day gym membership trial. I'm in the deepest of shit now. Hockey training starts next Monday. I've not been running. I've also been eating a lot. This will greatly affect my performance.

To be honest, I think I'm a fairly okay runner. Given my weight, I'm supposed to be classified as physically unfit. But I bet you, I can out run more than half my secondary school class. However, those people are a bunch of seriously unsporty people. Many of them are actually some of my very close friends. They know it themselves.

In order to motivate myself, I spent $75 on a pair of sports earphones by Adidas and Sennheiser. I've never in my life spent that much on anything at one go, without much thinking. I hope it's a good investment. I also bought a set of three Nike hair bands that are sweat-absorbant to go with the "look".

I'm seriously all-for-it now. I hope I'm daring enough to go gyming myself everyday from Wednesday onwards. I hope. I pray. Really need this.
arcanus: (Default)
Only TWO other people on this earth should know about this little journal I have here. (who probably don't even read this anymore!)

Recently, I had this conversation with this friend I have who doesn't know about this journal. She made a comment that was related to an entry I have on this journal, which was... uncanny. I've never told anyone how I felt about that matter. Unless she could read my mind?

is wrong because 1. I did not lock this journal, 2. the world wide web is so muthafucking huge and Google our best friend can grant access to almost any site in the world and 3. I probably secretly want you to read it.  I know, I know.

Therefore, for the record, I am not liable for any emotional damage caused to you (the reader) or your friends (you, the reader, being the spreader) because I have no clue that you're reading what I write and hence I do not need to practise caution when writing what I honestly feel.

Also, please note that since I do not intend to hurt anyone's feelings, the person whose feelings got hurt should not worry about me hating him/her because usually, I do not. These "aggressors" that I speak off, they only anger me for a limited period of time and I do not judge that person just by one small action he/she did. We all make mistakes right? 

Ps. There's only ONE person in my life that I currently hate. Don't worry, he/she isn't you. He/she probably can't even read the first few lines of this entry because his/her brain would be too small to comprehend.
arcanus: (Default)
"Everything popular is wrong"
Oscar Wilde

Pet Peeve

Jul. 28th, 2010 09:32 pm
arcanus: (Default)
 I absolutely cannot stand the fact that people start bashing the things I like when I choose to remain silent about other people's favourites. The thing is, I really really like Harry Potter and I cannot stand people mocking the series in any way possible. For example, I still can recall this particular person I know who mocked Harry Potter in front of me some time back very very clearly and it really really makes my blood boil thinking of it, the sarcasm she used. In recent years, I have been very patient with people and I chose not to flare up at my aggressor that day. 

Today, a teacher openly expressed his distaste for Lady Gaga (another one of my favourites) during lesson while some of my classmates backed him up, going "ewww, yucks" in the background. Of course, I took offense to that (I have actually told people that I do like her) but just sat there silently, fighting to control my unhappiness. Yes, Lady Gaga may be eccentric but the people making such snide remarks about her do not actually listen to her music/appreciate her appearances as an art form like I do.


Jul. 26th, 2010 09:43 pm
arcanus: (Default)
It's been months since I posted.

I guess I've finally come to terms with being in a neighborhood JC. But wtf, FASS admission ABB/C? Who am I to compete with the rest of the JC population, the elites?

I believe the only reasons as to why I'm so happy where I am now are as follows:

1) My Classmates
- By far the best class I've ever had, where everyone (almost) is so accepting (especially of my wild behaviour sometimes) and being better with words, able to express ourselves/ understand each other even better.

2) My Subject Combination
- Never once in my life here have I had great troubles completing/keeping up with homework. Workload is relatively low. My only obstacle is my bane of existance - the mandatory Chinese Language, not by choice so I'm not complaining. There is also occasional struggles with Economics, but nothing too much for me to handle.

Also, may I announce that I will be changing paths. Everyone, please give me your fullest support in my attempt to train myself to be a decent hockey player. It is a very daring journey I'm about to embark, and although the excess weight on my body (in other words: fat) isn't a good judgment of my level of fitness (Don't judge a book by its cover. I am, in fact, a /soon to be/ lean mean fighting machine!) I'm very excited and I hope this actually works out well.

Wish me luck!
arcanus: (Default)
I think my friends shun me cos I'm in a lousy neighbourhood JC.
arcanus: (Default)

1) The length of my smses cannot exceed 3 pages, ie., 3 x 160 characters, or else it would automatically convert to mms. Why does that suck? 1. My dad disabled gprs which means I cannot send mmses. 2. I usually write a lot, have a lot to say and can never seem to reduce word count.

2) Battery life < 1 day, it can never last me through the next day if I happen to forget to charge the night before. I don't even use the lousy apps/enable wifi! I use my phone entirely for calls and smses only and my phone is on silent mode > half the time.

(There was a #3, but I figured out how to solve the problem! )

Other than that,

I LOVE MY PHONE! slide-out qwerty keypad, functional camera & easy tweeting of photos, lovely landscape wallpaper, to name a few.

Of course, it cannot be compared to my iPod touch and I, like everyone else, hope for an iPhone. iPhone > all phones. But as I said, I already have an iPod touch which serves its function well. Need ≠ Want. :(
arcanus: (Default)
The word moolah. Why can't you just use the word in its actual meaning, "Money"? It's a letter less too.

Rude people, ie., people who asks for/given favours without saying please/thank you. Especially if he/she's a friend.

God forbid people who happily spell "weird" as "wierd" and think it's cool. (Includes Their vs They're. Your vs You're. Than vs Then)

Going to the ATM wanting to withdraw $20, it says not available and I have no choice but to withdraw $50 instead, making my $$$ dry out quick.

People who wear The Beatles T-Shirts without even liking/knowing/listening to the band, or any band for that matter. Liking a band only for their image is just wrong. W-R-O-N-G , wrong!

arcanus: (Default)

I'm infatuated with this red little monster. Facinated. In awe. I'm just amazed at how beautiful this thing can be. I've never looked at a car this way. In fact, I'm not really in to cars and I think most cars look all about the same. Except this beautiful thing. Sounds like i'm in love. With an inanimate object.

I would really love to meet someone who owns this. Maybe take a ride, go for a spin. That'll be awesome. Just taking a look at its interior can make me squeal like a crazy twilight fangirl. (As if taking secret snap shots of this thing on the roads isn't bad enough!)

One day, I know I'll own one of these. Driving 'round town with people I love. Embracing singlehood. Me, a powerful and successful Career woman. This will also be the only reason why I'll want a driving license. I know I won't like driving very much, but in the name of love, I will give it a shot!

Until then, I await the day I meet someone who owns a Mini Cooper and is willing to let me go for a drive.



Dec. 29th, 2009 01:46 am
arcanus: (Default)
I can't believe I thought Oasis was crap when I first listened to them a couple months back! Now, I'm in love with them! Ahgagaga! Great timing, since I've been listening to very crappy music lately. Too much of Switchfoot isn't good either.

If only I actually listened to them sooner.

I just found out that they recently had a concert in Singapore! !@#$%^&* WHY!? It's the same for Switchfoot! They had a concert this year too!! How convenient to fall in love with these great bands just after they left my nation not long ago for a concert. I don't think they'll EVER come back. Not any time soon, at least. The next time they come back, I'll most probably have already changed my music preference. I'm like that. I know myself too well. At this rate, I don't think I'll ever attend any proper rock concert at all. I have no interest to spend my $100+ bux on bands I don't even listen to. Like Green Day. No, not really.

arcanus: (Default)
"Worst Christmas ever!"
I say that every year. 

The xmas spirit in me seems to be quickly diminishing every year ever since I can remember. I'll always allow myself to be disappointed every single year despite knowing that I will be disappointed. Who knows, in years to come, I might not even want to attend parties much less to say enjoy them.



Dec. 20th, 2009 02:00 am
arcanus: (Default)

arcānus m. (feminine arcānaneuter arcānum); first/second declension

  1. hidden, secret, private
  2. intimate, personal, confidential
  3. trustworthy (to keep a secret)